Couples Counseling

If you’re on this page, then your marriage is probably in big trouble and you are considering couples counseling. Perhaps you have tried couples counseling before but just weren’t ready to make changes or didn’t learn how to rebuild trust. Maybe your sex life is dried up and you lack emotional connection. You may have been given an ultimatum and tried to change on your own, but failed. You are now one step away from a separation or worse yet, a divorce. If you’ve had enough advice from friends and are tired of reading self-help books, then it’s time to try something new. A lot depends on it, and we can help.

We specialize in helping couples prevent divorce.  We are pro-marriage, pro-family.

WE CAN HELP, IT’S OUR SPECIALTY

Did you know that the majority of therapists out there have not been specifically trained to work with couples?  When seeking a couples therapist make sure to ask if they are actually trained to do the work.  Mental health therapy is vastly different than couples counseling.  Why is that?  Well, during couples counseling we are not treating a mental health disease state, we are saving marriages.  If we only focus on the individual who is diagnosed with a mental health disorder we are essentially saying, “you’re the problem here”.  When in reality we want to work with each couple to understand their system of marriage, their history and how we can move them forward. 

Both Dr. Terri and Tina Wankey have been specialty trained in the Gottman Method of couples counseling and have a special interest in uncovering couple’s attachment styles. They each bring a wide range of experiences working with couples and helping them bring trust and commitment back into their relationship.

You know what?…Most couples can get through this, and you can too!

COMPREHENSIVE COUPLES ASSESSMENT

We offer a 4 part assessment process that uncovers the root of the problem.  If you cannot express your authentic emotions you will engage in a trauma reaction instead.  This will engage your fight, flight or freeze response which will not allow you to trust.  Learning how to trust again is central to couples counseling, but is often overlooked.  Learning how to make real amends with each other is part of the process.  If you are ready to trust, change behavior and make real amends with each other then you are ready to call us today. 

COUPLES COUNSELING INTENSIVE

Are you wanting to jump start the process or have traveled a distance to see us?  We offer a Couples Intensive half-day or full-day session designed just for you. Please call Dr. Terri for a pre-screening telephone consultation to see if this is right for you

 

LEARN TO CONNECT

In the beginning of your relationship you put your best foot forward, talked until the wee hours of the night and created shared meaning with each other. Over time, life got in the way and began to erode your connection. The 5 Love Languages® has helped countless couples identify practical and powerful ways to express love simply by using the appropriate love language. Many husbands and wives who spent years struggling through marriages they thought were loveless discovered one or both spouses had long been showing love through messages that weren’t getting through. By recognizing their different love languages, they witnessed the rebirth of the love they thought had been gone for good.

Reconnect With Your Partner

PREDICTORS OF DIVORCE

“Trouble comes from the mouth.” – Chinese Proverb

You may be surprised to learn that affairs and finances do not predict divorce.  The biggest predictor of divorce is attachment style and words. You heard it correctly, the words you choose to say to your partner predict whether you will remain together or not. Words matter, sentiment matters more. Using words of contempt and criticism are sure fire ways to destroy your relationship. Learning new ways to express yourself, even during times of conflict, help rebuild connection, develop emotional trust and revitalize your sex life. Who doesn’t want that?

 

INFIDELITY and AFFAIRS

If managing the craziness after an affair has you feeling helpless, then you are in the right place.  There are several kinds of unfaithfulness that can occur in a marriage: Trauma, Abuse, Emotional Neglect and Disapproval of Emotion.  All of these erode Trust. The betrayed want to know if they can ever simply relax, enjoy and trust their partner again without being threatened, feeling insecure and reliving the affair in their minds. Generally, the one who betrayed is ready to move on and doesn’t know how to help their partner do the same. This is because an affair is a traumatic event. Moving through the trauma is the ticket to the other side.

We realize that rebuilding trust after an affair is no easy matter. We use a combination of attachment theory and EMDR to treat the trauma to help couples heal and move forward. It’s important to make a conscious decision to reframe your beliefs about what is possible in YOUR life and what you want for your experience.

 

COUPLES IN RECOVERY

If one or both of you has struggled with addiction and you are now in recovery then you know the challenges you have been faced with.  There is a lot of water under the marital bridge that has been eroding your connection for a long time.  We know the challenges you face.  Let us help you trust again while also assisting you in maintaining your sobriety.  Your family is worth it.

Cardinal Point is a destination for holistic mental health and recovery care.Each professional who is here operates their own independent private practice